Thursday, August 20, 2009

Who's That New Purple People Eater..Brett Favre

Why It's Brett Favre, or could it be Brett Favor, as the NFL Commissioner
called him on draft day 100 years ago. Maybe it's Brett "I've Retired" Favre,
Brett "I Hate Practice" Favre, or maybe it's really George Blanda!

George Blanda? Well, rumor is , this "masked man" is going to be
kicking extra points for the Vikings, not throwing Touchdown passes.

The Your Decision Maker has some predictions..

1. The Metrodome astro turf is to be retired after the season.

2. Fran Tarkenton's Minnesota passing records are safe, but not Fred Cox's!

3. You will within weeks see Ocho Cinco's Tweet on Twitter read..
Where's My Brett Favre playmate..Terry Brasdshaw!

4. Rumor is also a three way trade..Terrell Owens now headed for the Twin cities
for Brett's old throwing arm, the arm to the Cleveland Browns (for Brady Quinn)
and Buffalo receiving Braylon Edwards, his supply of stickum included.

5. Green Bay now Considering "a Stealth Defense" against Favre..the invisible
pass rush, just let him throw, we'll get 3-4 Picks.

6. The NFL considering a new supplemental draft for next year, A One Round draft
for all teams.. Old Quarterbacks for Free, Pick Any teams old Quarterback..
No compensation required. John Elway, however cannot go to Indianapolis.

7. The Oakland Raiders, and Al Davis, considering signing the NFL's All Century
Offensive team.

8. And lastly, for now at least Pittsburgh Steelers expanding trophy case for
their Seventh Lombordi Trophy.

Monday, December 29, 2008

New Blogojevich Scam Senatorial Candidate

Don, the Electrician, Newest Blagojevich Senatorial Scam Candidate
You heard president-elect Obama speak with Joe, the Plumber, and Joe providing Obama with an ear full, but you've never met Don, the electrician, Joe's half -brother. Well, we've met him and interviewed him on his perspective on the Economy, and other issues, and below are some reasons why he may be a candidate.

First, he indicated to us..His Personal Household Budget Is Balanced..Imagine That. His Mortgage is paid up to date. His credit card debt is nill. He doesn't borrow money to fund minor purchases, or his wants. He said he lives within his means. Yes, he indicated he at one time for a number of years rented, because he was not financial stable enough to take on a Mortgage. He also indicate since he doen't have the ability to borrow money at will and burden his children with the debt, he actually has had to cut his expense budget at times. He indicated also, de doesn't have the ability to print money whenever he desires.

He indicates he does borrow money to fund projects, associated with his Business. But he said he never borrows to meet his payroll obligations, contrary to what many so-called Businessmen in Detroit seem to promote. He said he has never been in a position where he had to beg for money. He said his banker won't even consider this approach. For some reason, his banker requires a viable Business Plan, and many times the loan Colaterized.

Don indicates he has made many mistakes, but has never had the luxury of someone continuing to provide him assistance to constantly enabe the actions which were associated with the mistakes.

Don indicates his personal retirement account has lost much of it's value, as have we all in this current economic crisis, but has indicated, all is not lost, and no need for anyone to Bail him out. Don indicates he will continue to seek opportunities.

Oh, and by the way, he has opinions on the Iraq War, Health Care, Bail-Outs, Family, Freedom, Abortion, Mariage , Our Monetary System, and even God.

And so we don't entirely get the wrong impression of Joe, he has given away thousands of dollars to those in need. He did say, he funds those programs who teach a person how to fish, rather than catch the fish for them. He indicated he has provided help to his immediate family, and his extended family as well when needed. He said he taught his children -- Personal Responsibility.

He also indicated he has joined the Sheepl Movement for more information

He says the routinely relies on his own "Your Decision Maker" Tool to help him with his decisions. Don says.."it's Amazing"

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Another Possible Illinois Senatorial Candidate

Britney Spears, Blagojevich Illinois Senatorial Candidate
Britney Spears, finally a female Candidate for the Illinois Senatorial Seat. Even American Idol welcomes her with open arms. Just recently, Simon Cowell. said,“She would, literally, be first on the list as far as I’m concerned in any capacity. He didn’t actually divulge who would appear as mentors/performers for the upcoming season — which kicks off January 13 — but he said the door is open any week for Britney to drop in. (Now if American Idol wants her, she can't be all bad). A perfect candidate for "Hollywood Czar". After all, don't they need one also?

Imagine the possibilities of some of our current Legislaters and the leg up they could have to show-case their talents on American Idol in front of Millions of TV viewers?

Why her attitude fits in well with most on Capital Hill already. She was quoted as saying.."I know not everyone will like me, but this is who I am so if you don't like it, tough! "

Her partying antics marvel those of Ted Kennedy's in his younger days. Britney at times doesn't wear underwear while out in public. She has hit a photographer with an umbrella. (With her popularity, maybe she can bring public partying back in vogue for our Capital Hill friends). It has been taboo for decades.

Her tatoos are legendary, and well known. I'm sure many like Barney Frank, Nancy Peglosi, and are and have been chomping at the bit to get some.
(Can't you just imagine the "New World Order" tatoo?)

How about her ability to encourage and pass legislation which would assist men in obtaining custody rights of their children, rather than the mothers? She lost custody of her's, so she knows first hand the warning signs of bad mothers.

All in all, her popularity would strengthen the image of Congress, not to mention the fact, she was once a "Mouseketeer". Now that's hard to obtain, so don't underestimate her abilities.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Hugh Hefner, newest Illinois Senatorial Candidate

Hugh Hefner

Here are some of the talents he brings to the table..I mean the text below!

Hugh Hefner, the latest possible candidate for the Illinois Senatorial seat. The Playboy mogul from , yes, Illinois originally. Can you imagine the black tie affairs on Capital Hill? Isn't he a natural for "Entertainment Czar" during this next Congress?
(It going to make Bill Clinton want to run for something).

Why Foreign dignataries, Kings, Prime Ministers, Princes, even Shek's will all be lining up to visit us for the after hours black tie affairs, after the daytime meetings and conferences. Imagine the concessions, and treaty's we could negotiate. (I'll bet we could get NAFTA repelled).

I wouldn't be surprised if the Queen Mother herself showed up occasionally. I'm sure Prince Charles would be along side. As for Barney Frank..this may drive him underground, or something like that. However, this may keep the Pope, and the Vatican away. Can't you imagine the extra traffic around the confession booths around Washington D. C. on Sunday mornings? (Maybe not a bad thing). We might learn who on Capital Hill still have their conscience.

Don't get me wrong, there is more to Hef than sex. It's just hard for me to put a pen to it. But seriously, he would bring a new and relaxed wardrobe to Capital Hill. Hugh has robes for every occasion. A more relaxed atmosphere would promote more constructive and imaginative ideas and laws. Wouldn't that be a good thing?

Lastly, the bunny ears Hugh put on his Playboy Playmates would have to be incorporated into the session in some manner. Maybe these could be worn buy all members of Congress who support a bill. This way it would be easier to get a head count, in determining if the bill should be brought to the House floor for a vote.

Rush Limbaugh, newest candidate in Illinois Senate Scam

Rush Limbaugh, newest candidate.

Another possible candidate possibly being considered in the Illinois Senatorial Scam.

Yes, Rush Limbaugh. Some of his past experiences provides him with excellent credentials. Rush would represent the Disabled well, sine he has severe hearing loss himself. New Lexislation enacted would be significantly easier because of Rush's high profile name. More Republicans would be more apt in supporting this type of legislation, thus approving their image of the party who doesn't care for the less unfortunate segment of society.

He too, could be an excellent "poster child" for new Drug Rehabilitation Programs at the Federal level. Because of his past history of dependency on pain killers, he could very well be the new "Anti-Drug Czar".

With him spear-heading these two areas the Republicans could paint themselves as being the softer, more gentler party. A party who represents the people, not big Corporations. Who knows, a new party..The Rusatonians.

He too, could be an excellent candidate for the new "Fat Czar", since he has successfully lost a considerable amount of weight since he has come onto the national scene. You ask why "Fat Czar"? Well , with New York State just recently enacting a 18% tax on non diet sodas, it's evident, we fat people are the newest target for additional revenue, at both the federal and state level. "Fat Tax". ( You better not have a chronic thyroid problem)

With his well known personna as a "cigar aficionado", and since the finest cigars come from Cuba, he would be perfect as a our liason to Cuba, and Castro, in developing a new diplomatic strategy toward this regime.

Rush has labeled himself as a conservative, but many of his actions have spoken volumes as a "Democrat in Republican clothing". After all, aren't many of his actions which he has demonstrated more prevelent amongst liberals, and Democrats? He constantly indicates actions speak louder than words.

Who knows, maybe Rushatonians, the new third party movement.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Another Possible Candidate In Senatorial Scam

Terrell Owens, Dallas Cowboys Wide Receiver. There are number of excellent reason as to why Governor Blagojevich would have been considering him for the Illinois Senatorial seat. Here are just a few..

Terrell can bring more cosy, fussy feeling to the Press Conferences on Capital Hill. After all his crying antics are short of remarkable in his attempt to obtain approval for his cause, or situation he addresses. (imagine public approval improvement)

He seems to be an expert when it comes to writing instruments. Remember the sharpie incidents in the end zone during his games when he autographed the footballs with these writing instruments. Can you imagine the various designs of pens he could use in his new post? Why he would be able to sign new legislation into law with a different scenario each time. His writing skills probably would marvel those of Ernest Hemingway's (sorry Ernest).

It's to bad he won't possibly be taking office until after the first of the year. Since his middle name is"Eldorado", imagine the insight he has into the Automomibe Bail-out legislation? (However, they will be back, he still has an opportunity) .

He aparently has the ability to sniff out wrong doing as evidenced by..his recently accusing Tony Romo of secretly plotting to have all pass plays go through Jason Witten since the two are roommates and good friends. (Open the Kennedy files)

His spitting abilities are legendary. Remember his spitting on DeAngelo Hall during a game? Maybe introduce a new procedure in Congress were they he could spit on legislation he and his party doesn't support. (maybe a way to revive the chewing tobacco, and snuff industry).

In summary, many of his inovative antics certainly could be utilized on capital hill, since they seem to have only the ability to react, rather than being innovative.

Should you have any additional comments or opinions

Monday, December 15, 2008

Another Possible Candidate in Senatorial Scam

As promised by the Decision Maker, here are the details behind why Bart Simpson may be one of the candidates who was considered by the Governor in the Blagojevich Senatorial scam.

Bart does actually understand the United States Constitution, as evidenced by a number of quotes associated to him. "Spitballs are not free speech" "The first amendment does not cover burping".

Remember, Bart isn't 10 years old as depicted in his television program. He's been 10 for 12-13 years, thus he's in his early 20's.

He knows quite a bit about Springfield, and all the mischief which centers around this city in Illinois, since he attends Springfield Elementary. After all, mischief is part of his natural character, thus positions him perfectly in grasping the ability to participate in all the scams perpetrated on the American public. (no on the job training involved here)

Bart has his own credit card 4123 0412 3456 7890. (No need for a taxpayer card).

One of Bart's pets is an elephant, named Stumpy. (This may make him a Republican in disguise)

He understands the need for planning and implementing, as evidenced by several quotes from the past. "Relax Lis, Dad and I always have plan B" "You probably should have researched this, Eh Dad". (With Bart, comes Homer Simpson, for FREE)

AND LASTLY, ACCORDING TO BART.. I didn't do it, No one saw me do it, No one can prove anything. (what a possible candidate)